Monday, April 23, 2012

Some of the other side of the adventure

   When I first started blogging about our move to California, I made a conscious decision not to divulge too much (or at all) about the struggles I would encounter while living here.  After all, I created the blog to share my pictures, not my feelings (otherwise, I sure wouldn't have posted the site on Facebook!).   And too, what validity would any of my complaints have?  I had been taken out of a very full and busy life and brought to a beautiful place to live with my husband and my dog.  What possible negative emotions could surface with such a gift?   Well, there's another side of this adventure that does include my emotions and believe me (or ask Steve) they have been all over the place in the past three months.

   Confirmation that I needed to include some of my emotional journey in this blog came when I received a call from a friend today.   We had not talked in quite some time and when she asked how I was doing, she seemed surprised by my answer - "much better, last week was a turning point."   I elaborated on how living here had been one of the hardest things I had ever done.  She shared how, at times, my blog stirred up envy and discontentment within her own life as she longed to have the experience of getting away from it all.  I wondered how many other readers shared my friend's honest thoughts.  I knew that I  needed to not just post pictures of what we saw, or ate, or did, but include some of my longings and emotions that have surfaced since living here.

   I've gone from saying, "I can't believe I get to do this!" to "I'm not sure I can do this!" to  "I know that God wants me here"- which is a good place to be.  My longings for community, fellowship, and serving others are all valid and I'm hopeful that the church we've been attending will enable us to experience all three.   I'll keep you posted.

  P. S.  Quite a different post from the PicMonkey post, huh?  (I hope you weren't worried about me!)


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